My Rhythm,My Style

2011-04-19T19:34:00.004+08:00

HELLO BLOG =))

Its been Long.. .

Just to summarise,

Got myself a new job. In May, its going to be my 4mths there.

Everyday im learning something new..

Meet a couple of niceeeee people..=D

N Being surrounded by special kids, makes me feel special & i thank god for everything..

Alot of shits has happened & is still going on..

But i aint gonna complain abt anything.

I am just gonna look forward.

I am very happy with the people i have.

I dont need a million frens...,just 1 close one, & my life will be happy.

Veryy Thankful to god for giving me them.. =)

At the end of the day, i am a happy gal..

& DAD, i still love you =D

2010-12-01T13:13:00.001+08:00

HAIZ!!

Hating myself for making a mistake again.

FUCK!!!

Got to somehow clear the mess up.

Dam..

*SwitChed OFF mode*

2010-11-30T11:04:00.002+08:00

*Stressed & Worried Mode*

Most will feel relaxed if they aint working, can take it as a short break..

I cant even feel that..

In the family i am, i got to work everyday coz i need to provide for the family..

Now that i am finding a job, i am worried coz i need a gd job..

Stressed coz i need a job soon.

Dam disappointed about the childcare job.

having an assumption & facing it is 2 different things.

Under that line, i realised passion, patience, tolerance is very important to keep you going.

YES, i love kids, but that wasnt enough to keep me going.

I was happy doing it, so i left..

FUCK!!

Ok whatever.!!

NOW I NEED A JOB.

2010-10-02T00:14:00.002+08:00

I have no BF.

I dont come from a rich family.

Despite alot of falls, i always stand up strong.

Yes i am sacarstic.

Yes i am arrogant.

But i have a BIG BIG heart.

I love my closed ones.

Even if they hate me, i dont give up relationships easily.

All my life, i have felt lonely.

ALways made my own decisions.

Always felt that life's unfair.

& Kept qn-ing god, WHY?

Why is it always PAIN?

Why must it always be TEARS?

there is alot of things i regret in my life.

EXCEPT FOR MY PARENTS..

they are my best gifts.

yes, i dont have a dad.

But 9 yrs is all i need, my dad is still ranked no 1 in my heart.

n my PRECIOUS WOMAN.

NO ONE can ever replace her.

I can give up anything for my mum.

Being both a dad & mum aint easy, but to me shes done an awesome job.

but how the kids turn out to be, its their own choice.

Dont even dare blame my mum.

U got to go through me before you get to her.

THANK YOU GOD FOR THE PRICELESS GIFT!!!

2010-10-02T00:03:00.003+08:00

n finally signed the contract..

have to pass my employment checkup before i can start..

man, hope everything goes smoothly.

the thought of leaving SH makes me feel very very sad.

Alot of memories, will really miss all the people..

but fuck SH & Managment..

really really pray i made the right move in my life.

i am really gonna work hard.

PLS GOD, be by my side..

n now, its time to burst out.

i think guys are fuckedup..

yes, there r good ones, no doubt in that.

but how many r there???

Guys R brainless..

Guys R useless.

Guys R selfish..

Guys only think of themselves..

Guys give up everything for friends..

OMG, dam angry.

play all you want boy, but let me tell you, god is watching.

he makes sure everything learns their lesson at 1 pt of time.

urs yet to come.

get prepared to face the music for whatever you are doing now.

yes, u r my family.

yes, i lurve u always.

BUT, i still need you to learn your lesson even if its the harder way.

WhatEVER!!

PEaceOUT!!!

2010-09-29T17:15:00.005+08:00

good afternoon all =)

a day resting at home feels damm good..

work's been FuckIng MAD.

the day new management took over, we've been drowning.

But we aint a loser like the boss n team leader..

just a mth plus, n they r giving up?

WTF!!

we as TEMPS have been running the whole show for a mth plus now..

wait till i leave, u guys DIE.!!

i dont give a shit abt it..

except for the fact, i hope joseph doesnt get bullied.

when i asked for a perm post, u rejected me coz i said NO to some of ur requirments.

but now u came to me offering a perm position.

But this time, i have decided to move on for good.

I aint gonna stay and get pressured under u MArio!!!!

too badddd!!!

i need to have fun real sooo n n n n n ..!!!

its been long since i really freaked out..

good luck hasnah sis =)

n yes lastly, say hello to my hot stuff below.. =D

2010-09-25T11:39:00.003+08:00

WOOHHOOOOOOO!!

i am BACK after 9mths ?? WOW!!

ALOT to say, but dunnoe where to start!!

1st things 1st, i am done with my 1day attachment at childcare centre.

it wasnt perfect BUT it was worthwile..

but a qn within me, am i making the right decision ??

was browsing thru someone fb acc yst!!

he was there to reply msges on 19/09 but he aint here anymore. JUST GONE!

i got no idea who he is, but that matter really affected me..

LIFE IS TOO SHORT, yet here we are taking things for granted.

Each day we wake in the morn, we ought to thank god for giving us a chance to live.

There's no 2nd chance to life..When its time its GONE forever..

man, its time i get my ass back to praying..

scary shit..

i want no regrets..

2 people ask me out 2day.

got to say no to my darlz coz i agreed to go out with my dearest sis.

we will go out soon k lurve? =)

Dunnoe y, but i get this feeling that people close to my heart are slowly going away from me..

hmmmmmm.. . . .

my buddy is one of them..

things aint the same anymore.

but hes still my buddy!

Always Keep Ur SMILES people =D

2009-12-18T01:20:00.002+08:00

Back for an update after a lonnnnnnnnnnggg time..!!

N yup I am 22 YEARS OLD now..!!!

THankssssssssss to ALL the birthday wishes, songs, gifts etc..!! Very much appreciated..! Although im not in the mood to celebrate anything, I still got to be happy for ppl ard me. Thank you all for being there for me always.! U guys noe who u r..!!

Although I m fuckingggggggg down nowadays, its u ppl who kip me goingggggg strong each day..!! Friends ask me ‘ how can you be soooooo strong n bear all this’??? n then I ask them back ‘what u wan me to do?? Commit suicide??’..! Running away from problems is not gonna solve anything.!!! Got to face it & overcome it..! Although I hate my life..Cuz I have gone thruuuu soooooooo much pain which I feel i dun deserve to..ppl of my age r enjoying life..but here I am hating life..!

I always smile on the outside.. Ppl describe me as a happy person..! Seeing ppl happy makes me happy..! But on the inside, im tearing apart..! Knowing that there r ppl who care & love me, im going strong despite all the problems..!

So to ppl who r lucky & have a happy life, pls treasure what u guys have & dun take things for granted..! U wouldn’t wan a life in which u hurt each day..!

I got alotttttttt to say.. but im just lost for words.!!

Thanks to my closest & precious ppl. . .!! U guys mean the world to me..!

I MISS MY DAD REAL BADLY… . .. !!!

N lastly.,

HAPPY 22^ND BIRTHDAY TO ME.!

2009-11-05T09:35:00.001+08:00

It’s a COLD BORING Thursday!!

My birthday is a mth++ away..! Friends ask me what I want..
Seriously I got no idea man..Im not a birthday kinda person.I dun like all those celebrations..gifts n etc..But since they r giving, I will accept it with a smile..!

Things I DO NOT want..

BABA curry powder
Tops

Things I Do not mind getting..

Shawls
Big Big Earrings
Perfumes
Bangles,hand accessories
Bags..those sling kinda.. (not too girly ar)
Nice necklance =) (chain length not too short.)
Makeup products (since that now im trying to wear some)

I cant think of anything else man..! Just get me anything u think I might like..!
U noe me..! I dun complain..! I accept anything =)

Back to workz! Ciao..!

Good day ALL =)

2009-10-29T10:05:00.001+08:00

Good Morning Everyone =D

Back to update my blog since im very free now..!
No work so far. Great..!! But Bored..!
N its THUR.. Nearing the weekends..! HAPPY..!

A lot of things have been running in my mind..Im turning 22 soon..
More responsibilities for me..! Sometimes I feel like im ardy running a family..!That’s the level of pressure im facing now..!But I’ve done well so far.. N I am proud of myself..!

Life is never easy..thats what I tell everyone ard me..
If u expect happiness to last 4ever..den u r wrong..! Wake up & face the real world ppl..!

I believe that no one can go on doing bad things in life. At some pt of time, god will make something happen where one will learn a lesson..

So to my bro, this is NOT THE END. it is just the beginning. Everyone makes mistakes in life. Its whether you are able to face it n change from there..! Rather live life the hard way..!

I am really happy & proud of my frenz whom I have gained. They r those who will be there for me when I have no one..! Will help me even without me asking.. Willing to hear my sad stories & encourage me always..! You ppl noe who u r..! SO to my ‘CLOSE ONES’, thank you so much for everything..U guys r always loved =)

Jonathan Basil.. Logathiran.. Knagesvaran.. PLS BE SAFE ON ROAD!!

Time for Workzzz!!!

2009-09-16T12:36:00.005+08:00

Time for an update..

Past few days wanted to update but blogger seem screwed up. Now I realize is my stupid lappy. ! So no choice got to update while working. =p

Month of SEP, birthday of close ones..

SHALINI..

Used to be my close friend back at sec sch.BUT now is different. Time passes,things change so people change. So did we. We lost contact. Now she’s at Aus. Although I m not close to her now, I will always rmbr the times when we hangout together. So wishing her happiness in everything. Stay happy gal..

HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY SHALINI..

KALAIVANI..

We go a LONG way back manz.Noe her for 15yrz now. Dam tats long..Theres a lot to say abt us. Rmbr the pri sch days when we played blk catching together. I was very naughty last time..n she will always complain to my mum abt me.hahaa! The hamzah days,poly days, weekly Mac’s session, midnight phone calls.. hmmmm..now this woman is enjoying in Aus as well. Get ur things done n back to spore OKAY.Im missing you already..=) Stay Crazy as usual..

HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY KALAIVANI..

LOGATHIRAN..

Known him for 9 yrs now..!! Someone close to my heart.! Ours is a very ‘difficult to understand’ friendship..haha.We argue most of the time. I will nag n complain when he drink..n he will get fed up. He is very temperamental. Hard to understand BUT still he’s very special.! He always been there for me. When something is wrong, he noes it..!But things between sour between us now. But I noe we will work things out..! When its someone important, giving in to them is not a big deal at all. =) SO to my buddy,

HAPPY 25TH BIRTHDAY BUDDY..

Right now I am thinking abt JONATHAN BASIL.Wonder how is he doing.Am sure he will do just finee.!He called me twice past days but din ans =( Do well lil wan..! Meet u wen ure out..Lurvez!

OUTZ!

2009-09-01T10:40:00.001+08:00

The month of SEP is here!

Fasting..
Raya..
Kalai’s birthday..
Buddy’s birthday..
Jonathan Basil goes NS..
Mumbai’s meeting..
Meeting wid my sista’s still pending..
Meeting wid Jp & Jon pending as well..

This mth is packed with so much of things.Gonna be a Busy mth I guess.
Got to go do my Hair..Raya Shopping..Do gift for my 2 dearest ppl..Go buy my dig cam’s charger..spoilt.dam.meeting of frenz.Everything within 3 wks..BUSY..haha! But I like =)

Feeling irritated Right NOW.I HATE the feeling of being treated unfairly..!
I mean WE DO SO MUCH yet this is what we get ? ? ? Chicken Nuggets..
I wish I can just spit out every single thing BUT well..hmmmmmm...NVM..

A lot of things going thru in my mind..Duno what to say n not to anymore.! Going go silent..!

Any idea’s on birthday gifts ppl ? ? I cant think anymore..keke!

N I think I LOVE MY NEW BLOG SKIN..its soo simple & nicee..! Well,done by me of cuz.!!

LASTLY, I LOVE ANTONIO VALENCIA <3

2009-08-24T10:51:00.000+08:00

Been thinking a lot lately..!

Those people who know me usually describe me as a strong individual who faces everything that comes my way bravely.!

That is true. No matter how many times I’ve fallen down. I always stood up strong n move on..! So people always think no matter what happens, I can handle it..Im strong enough to go thru it..! They say it so easily.

But here comes my qn.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to move on after each fall ?

Do you know how hard it is to keep smiling outside when u are hurting inside ?

Do you know the pain of carrying so much of responsibilities & burden in a young age ?

Do you know how It feels to go to work/sch/anywhere penniless. without even a cent ?

Sometimes I wonder, how many people actually understand me ?

Think about this qns people. How many people go thru such things everyday in ur lives? lot of people still depend on ur parents for everything. People think if they r happy now, they will be happy forever. THATS VERY WRONG! Life is unpredictable.

Current Mood : MooDLess!

2009-08-24T09:28:00.000+08:00

ONCE I WAS..NOW I DON’T KNOW ANYMORE..

Current mood : HURT.

2009-08-20T18:06:00.003+08:00

MONEY is everything in this world man.!
If you dont have $,u will be looked down at!
Haiz..!

With the current job paying SO LOW! How in the world to even save $$$$$$$? ? ? ? ?
Insurance. . . CPF....Bills...Housethings...Etc... Fucking hate this life im living..!
So much of pressure,responsibility,burden.. CMON people, im fucking 22 only..!
i have not even settled down..! How much can i do ? ? ? Feeling so pissed ryte now..!
DAM . . . . .

As usual,can only hope things will get better?? Or well,im tired of thinking that way..!
If pain & suffer is what i have to go thru,let it be..Bring it on..! i had rather live life thru the hard way!

OUTZ!

2009-08-19T10:02:00.001+08:00

Its WED =)
Reached the hill top..keke.!A day more to go to weekends! Fri on leave..

FTT!! Can I pass the first time??? I doubt..haha! Haven had time to study much.. N some things r so confusing. What the hell. No harm trying though.. JIA YOU ! !!

Here I am at work. Listening to music.. & guess who I am thinking of???
MY EX!! Wth ryte.. I mean.. he was someone whom I dun really care abt n now he’s sudd on my mind..haha.! weird..! But well thinking back, those young days were fun.! We experienced a lot of things. Went on with guys whom u dun even noe well..! I did so much of crazy things b4. I was hanging out with so much of guyz..getting home late. getting into trouble always. I liked both my 1st & 2nd bf.But preferred the 1st though. He cute, nice ,funny.. I like =) 2nd one was a nice person too. We used to hang 2gether in a grp..but..hmmm.ya..haha! N lastly my 3rd bf..He had both Gd n bad side of him. Just that bad weigh more.! Suspicious, over protective etc..The things I HATE in anyone. So din last again. Thinking of it, maybe its cuz we were young & din take things seriously, nothing worked out.! If it was to happen now, maybe we noe how to handle it n keep a R/S going??? Hmmmmm I wonder..

Back to workz..

CIaoz !!

2009-08-17T11:37:00.000+08:00

GD morning all…..!
@ workz..totally no mood to work.! Stomach FUCKING pain..chicken!!
Y must only girls go thru such pain ? ? ?? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? No answer to this,I noe that!!

SOCCER UPDATES!

Bad start to the season by Liverpool. Lost 2-1 to Spurs.Dam..But spurs were good..!This time, the better team won. Got to admit.!
Buck Up Liverpool!!

But gd game by other tops 3! MANU..CHEL..ARS..good job!!
Esp ARSENAL..! A young squad with a powerful start.! Got to love ARS man!

CESC FABREGAS <3
EDUARDO <3

Ookok focus! Liverpool Rockz btw! Haha!

Current Mood : FEELING SHITTY!

Ok Bye!

2009-08-14T15:35:00.000+08:00

H AR L O W =)

Its FRIDAY people! WE EE E e e e e e !
But office is dead as usual!!!

I am feeling HAPPY right now! Glad that things r getting better wid my buddy! That’s just how we r..! Arguments ,quarrels, misunderstanding BUT still buddies .
RYTE ?
Happy kid again =) Exactly a mth to ur bdae! N I have decided on ur gift..
Kekeke! SIMPLE & NICE I hope!

Really running out of $$ this mth! Dam! Insurance is killing me!
Get pay..just enough to pay up for everything.. How in the world to save like that ? ? Hmm m m m m m .. Any lobang for tuition ppl ? ? ??
Let me noe please. I need to earn EXTRA $$$$! Current pay so not enough! Haixz! Right now, Im so ENVYING RICH PPL..chicken! ! ! but rich ppl aso do have their own probs..WELL, I think I hate LIFE! Haha!

I better get my ass back to working.! Counting down to 7pm =)
4.5HRS to go. .. . . MOTIVATION = 0%

Im looking for a LiverPool HP poach. Anyone noe wher I can get it ? ??

CURRENT MOOD : SLEEPY..(yaWNz)

Ok bye!

2009-08-11T11:30:00.001+08:00

Back to workz :(
Ok before I forget, I shall entertain u guys with a BIG FUNNY JOKE!
Which happened on,

Day : FRIDAY
Date : 7/08/09
Time : Between 12-1pm
Location : In a BUS

Ok so here how it goes,

My colleagues & I set off for lunch to Sing Post. Waited for company bus! Boarded the crowded bus. No more sit left, so had to stand. While driving, duno why the fuck the driver horn. Keep horning. Well normal for drivers to horn so we din think much abt that.! Until something happened. The driver sudd put a HARD BRAKE! So hard that……

Guess what happen? SC, Meiqi, Sheila & ME fall down.! N I was the only one who fall flat onto the floor. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! what a fri rte?We tot bus got into an accident or something. But it was nth. Just the fucking driver, putting a hard brake. DAMMM! That was a great hard fall. All happened in a split second.! N the fucking driver doesn’t even have basic manners. Din even say SORRY. just kept looking.! Why is it so hard for ppl to say SORRY? Its his mistake to begin with! Some ladies took the iniative to help but GUYS..gosh! gd for nth.! After that every1 in the bus act serious. I mean cmon,I sure noe they felt laughing.! Cuz the 4 of us who fell just couldn’t stop laughing.!All of us got hurt at a few places.! What a FRI that was.! Gd experience.! Lucky no serious injuries..

Lesson Learnt : Always wear seat belt/Hold on to something on a bus..

Coz u never noe when the fucking driver will put a hard brake. Unless u dun mind falling in front of so many ppl! Hahaa!

When I told what happen to others, they couldn’t stop laughing..
They went, ‘It just runs in ur blood isn’t it? Keep falling each time’..
Well true. I cant stop embarrassing myself.! Haha!

Ok back to work ppl!

LATERZ!

2009-08-10T20:43:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE :)

Finally done with my new blog skin..Phew..It might look simple..
But theres ALOT of hardwork man..hahaha!

3 days of holi flew by so fast..Next is back to WORK WORK n WORK! sianx..
4more days to the weekends..arghh..getting up for work is tough nowadays.Bt still goin on strong :)

Living is really tough now..!with MONEY,living life is so much peaceful & easy..So to rich ppl
out there,dont take things for granted,when u dun have anything,than u will noe the real meaning of LIFE.!

I am still single,but i feel as though i am running a family & taking care of them.So much of
pressure,responsibilities,expectations,etc..DAM..nw i am gg thru so much,wonder how it will be
when i have my own family..STRESS ahEad!!!

Well,i've always lived life the harder way! Facing hardships,problems,fall each time.But we stood up always & keep going.! So no matter what i will face in future, i will never give up!

2009-07-28T13:37:00.029+08:00

HARLOWzz!
Work is so BORED.Time passing so slow.Gosh!
Waking up everyday & going to work is becoming a PROB now!

Life’s been pretty much ok.Work...Family...Frenz...
Same routine each day!

Puasa & Raya are just ard the corner..!Looking forward to it.!
Baking cookies, going raya shoppin ,meeting frenz for break fast,
rushing home after work,thinking of what color baju to wear etc..
These are feeling that comes once in a yr.!

Now to my frenz,

I miss A LOT of them..

My Mumbai gang!

Now the members seem to be split up..So hard for everyone to meet..
It been mths we last met..Duno wen we will meet again as a grp!
Maybe RAYA? ??? ?

N to the jurong gang!

Quack & Aunty,lets meet up soon!

N my sistas!

Rasmi & hui min..
One woman flew to aus..too busy to contact..
Better contact me once u r back rasmi.IF not u noe what I will do rite..
BURN DOWN UR HOUSE AR!Haha!
N chuah hm..We can always meet w/o that woman rite?Keke!

KALAIVANI!

Hey woman,when r u ever going to come spore man?U r missed like hell.!
Late night calls,mac’z meetupz..I miss all those.!

JONATHAN BASIL..!>

U r missed :)
Someone who has been ther always..More like the younger wan taking care of the elder wan!
Keke!Meet more b4 going ns aitez?U r so gonna be missed tambz!

THE BUDDY!

Well..Things r STILL VERY diff..!Duno what will happen..
I did my part..Took the initiative..Said sorry..What else ? ?
Doesn’t matter what u think of me..To me,u r still my best one..
Always will be ur buddy who loves to nag,argue,talks with sacarsm.
On top of this,the buddy who cares.
Hmm m m m m. ..

RACHEL
JASEE
VARAN

MEET ME UP SOON PPL..WE NID TO CATCH UP..

I sudd miss my sec & pri sch life badly..
Those were the timez we I had so much of fren..
Those irritating classmates of mine..
But now,some dun even rmbr or bother to acknowledge.
Quite sad actually.

N yap..I PASSED MY BTT.Nxt mth my FTT..Hope can pass that too.
The feeling of driving on the road is so SCARY.

I got something to tok abt..But will blog abt it later..Getting lazy now..
Haha!Back to workz..!

BE SAFE ON ROAD JON,VARAN,MAD!

2009-07-15T22:54:00.003+08:00

Im a HAPPY kid :)
cuz of my buddy!

saw him afterrr SO longgg..
itz been mthz!
haiz..!

although things r not back to normal..!
distance here n ther.!
i just wanted to see him..!
juz a wile but it made me happy..!
He'z one of those who can brighten up my day!

Recover soon dearest!
meet u real soon..!

Lurvez Loga!

2009-07-02T21:00:00.003+08:00

another week coming to an end!
We ee e e e !
its WeekEnds :)

honestly, i duno what to do anymore.!
i mean..!
coming to 3mths since we toked properly.!
duno what happened realli..
i mite be at fault..
i duno..
so i said SORRY!
but what happeneD?
my msg was ignored.
no reply to that.!
so what does that suppose to mean?
Haix!
like sheila'z nick,
'Everything DOES happen for a reason'..

wonder when thing will get bk to normal!
Haix!

Missing the Buddy! ! ! ! !

2009-06-28T15:11:00.003+08:00

HALO ALL!
yet another mth is coming to an end!
time flies dam fast !
nxt things is PuaSa,Raya..
n soon it will be 2010.!
WOW!

Going be a yr since ive been working at starhub!
Things going pretty good there except for the $$$$!
since we're temps,got no benefits at all!
hmm mm m m m ..!
hoping to find a better job soon!.

im feeling SO fustrated rite now.!
whats with ppl having no manners?
doesnt matter if u r my sis, bro, mother,fren..
when u take someone's thing,ASK for permission..
or at least let them noe u took their thing..
i hate the feeling of realising something is lost n i got to us
them if anyone took it..
n all go 'NO NOT ME'..
plz have the guts to owe up ppl..
one day u will get caught.!
i HATE such ppl..
dammm..
Angry ! !! ! !
haixxx!

Got myself a NEW wallet !!!
:)
after a long long time..!

My dad's death anni is coming..!
13 yrs have gone.!
still Missing him. .!
will always!

i miss my buddy too!
TC!

see u all!

2009-06-21T22:13:00.003+08:00

dam!
i missing my btt!
woke up late..
end up not gg..
shit!
got to do it on JULY!
haixxxxxxxxxxx...
got dragged..
haiz!

SO much things happened in my family..
nt mine but aunt'z family..!
thank god no one's hurt n all.!
hope things change for betta from now on!!
hm m m m m m m m!

MISSING YOU !

2009-06-08T21:48:00.003+08:00

HELO!
back for an update :)

life been pretty much same..
too busy with WORK WORK N WORK!
nth much!

time to start finding a new job..
more importantly a better paying job..
Current job is okay..
but pay is terribly low!
cant even save $$..
cant survive long like this..!
got to leave SOON!

Probz in family,is ON & OFF!
at the end of the day,we r FAMILY..!
so got to give in & help each other!

been so long since i met mumbaiz!
duno wen we will ever meet..
but met QUACK!
i miss calling that name!
haha!
we ate,toked,walked..
haha!
meet soon again :)

i miss kalai!
itz been a yr since i last saw her..
time fliez!
someone most closest to heart!
miss her much!

n my jasee n varan darlz!
wen itz we 3..things juz get mad..!
so much of fun & laughter.!
letz meet soon ppl!

n of coz my BUDDY!
things r SO DIFF!
but i will nvr give up..
i will keep my usual msgs coming..
whether anot i get any repliez!
juz be safe.!

n Jonathan BASil!
my lil one..!
haha!
turning 21 in 3 dayz!
we ee e ee e e e :)
my brother has grown so much..
i will try the lvl best to come 4 the party? ok?
thankz for inviting me..!

lastly THE DAD :)

2009-05-19T22:17:00.008+08:00

i dun noe y i am even trying?

i noe i wld get attitude bk in return..

but i still chose to msg...

expcting that he wld have cool down!

but i guez not..

cuz i got attitude in return!

ahya!

it doesnt matter.

someone close has all the rights to be angry at me!

hm m m m mm m !

I Miss my buddy!

i miss the uncountable sms sent!

i miss watching wwe wid u!

i miss those small argument..

i miss the time wher u were always there for me!

i noe u r still there for me..

but thingz juz seem abit diff.!

itz not me n u!

itz juz the situationz made thingz like that..!

waiting for the day wher i can realli meet u..

n be our usual self..!

the name written down while thinking of u!

Lurvez!

i miss calling u 'BUDDY!'

2009-05-19T22:03:00.006+08:00

Aini'z Wedd!

STARHUB GREEN!

2009-05-19T16:56:00.005+08:00

@ workz!
Not that busy..so updating haha!

Starhub has moved to Ubi..
No more cuppage rd anymore..
Sadness :(
Traveling here everyday suckz..!
No mood to work too..
Gosh!
Duno how long can tahan!
I need a better paying job like URGENTLY!
Haha!

Life’s been really tiring..
Juz realize that each time i update I’ve got so much to complain abt..
Thatz my life.
Haix!

Sometimez I dun understand parentz think..
They can complain so much abt kids not listening to them n all..
But y cnt they try n think from the kids point of view?
Why is it so diff for them to understand us?

I hate being pressurized..
I really hate that..!
Oh god!

Dayz feel so sucky..!
Those who make me happy, got misunderstanding with them!
Haix!
I duno y things r happening like this!
I cnt concentrate on anything nowadays.
I keep thinking.!
Everything seems messed up!

I miss kalai..
I miss my buddy..
I miss my dad..
I miss the good times with my family..
I miss my frenz..
I miss my yung dayz..

Hm m m mm m m m m m m . .

2009-05-11T21:42:00.010+08:00

Today is the birthday of 3 close ppl!

Firstly..
my cuzin bro mubeen!
someone who was so close to my dad b4.!
wishing him all the best in everything he do!

HapPY brithDay Bro!

Secondly..
my fren knageswari!
someone whom i got to noe 4-5 yrz bk!
hes alwayz loved by my mum & granny!
haha!
has done alot thingz for me.!
never expecting anything in return!
someone close to my heart.!
although now we r both busy,
u r alwayz rmbred!
have truckloadz of fun ok?
see u soon!

HapPy birthday VArAN! :)

Lastly..
the MOST ImportAnt & PreciOus person in my life.!
HEz my dad.!
hes no more wid me..
but he is alwayz living in my heart!
although i was not fortunate enough to be wid him for long..
those short 9 yrz taught me ALot of thingz!
Despite being seriously ill..
he still gave helping hand to anyone in need.!
even when he knew it was his time to go,even when he was bed ridden,
he still prayed to god..
he never gave up in anything!
god has taken away alot from me..
but it doesnt matter..
he has given me 2 priceless giftZ!.
my MUM & DAD!
nothing can ever replace them!
i can go on & on..!
but it juz hurtz to tok abt these thingz!

to my dad,
u suffered alot of pain here..!
but i noe,u will be very happy up there!..
thankz for being my dad!
loving u Alwayszzzzzzzzzzzz!
u r living in my heart.!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD! :)
Picturez r the only memory of him left wid us!

2009-05-10T21:42:00.006+08:00

SHahid Baby Birthday CeleBration + meeting cuz session!

2009-05-10T21:26:00.009+08:00

helo world :)

feel dam tired!
wen 4 nephew 1st yr bdae party yst!
slpt dam late..woke up at 8 2day..
wen to settle some stuff!
n finally met Jon..!
happy seeing the lil bro!
had lunch 2gether..!
n trust me,we can tok toK & TOK!
n he actually think i havent turn 21..
keke.!
awww how swt..!
thankz for thinking im still yung.!

came home ard 2pluz..
slpt for few minz..n cuzin sis came ovr..
got to wake up!
wen out to check out on sareez..!
cuz sis wedd nxt sat..n we're juz getting sareez..
indianz timing..
all last min..!

now am home feel so tired..
gonna head to bed early i guez..!

b4 that..

HAPPY MOTHERZ DAY TO ALL!

N to my mum,

thankz for being ther for us..
i noe how much pain u've gone thru in life,even nw..
losing a husband @ yung age..
u still took care of us..!
u r the reason for who i am now.!
although everyday is prob in life..
i am still SO THANKFUL to god for giving them as my parentz.!
i can give up anything for them.!
coz my mum gave up alot for us!
wishing happier dayz for my mum..
Love u alwayz mum..

THANK YOU!

another thing is..

I MISS MY BUDDY!

Hm m m m mm m m !

2.5 hrz more to go!

Itz the birthday of the most Impt & precious person in my life!

update Soon!

2009-05-04T19:19:00.004+08:00

Hey all!
Itz been awile since I last updated my blog..

At office now..
NO WORK AT ALL..
All done..
End of the mth den ppl throw work at us..end up got to do OT..
Now no work..
WTH!

Wonder if my bro is back home..
Quite worried!
Haix!

A lot of thing has been happening..
Too much..
Duno what to say n what not too..
Just been stressed..headache..confusion..
Cuz of frenz,family,myself??
I duno!

Life’s been rather tiring..
Itz always problemz..
Wonder y!
True..i rather learn things the harder way.
I will be a better person that way.
But there’s a limit to everything I gues!

I hate answering to other ppl..
I noe how to live my life..i noe whats wrong & right..
Even if I make a wrong choice now..i will face the consequences later.!
I hate it when ppl try to run my life,when they expect me to listen to them.!
I am grateful for the things you have done for me & family..
But if u expect me to listen to all u say in return..
Then IM SORRY..
I cant do that!
Ppl think they can understand the prob me & my family go thru..
U re wrong.
U can nvr understand it,unless u go thru it urself!

When guys grow up, they reali do create a lot of trouble..
Haix!
they do anything n everything they wan..
y cnt they take sometime to think abt otherz?
Thank god things ended smoothly..
What would have happened if it got serious?
What would have happen to my bro?
Ahya..
Cant imagine abt it..!
My bro is a very nice person..
Hes juz being an ass nowadays..!
But still loved always!

I’ve got so many ppl ard me..
Those who I treat as my close wanz.!
But y do I still feel lonely sometimez?

I noe itz hard for ppl to understand me..
I cnt make everybody happy..
Sometimes one might think I give excuses always..
Itz not that I wan,its I got no choice..!
So to ppl who understand me n my probz..
Thanks A LOT!
For ppl who dun..itz ok!i noe itz hard..!

Despite all this,
I am still happy for who I am.!
If given a choice,I would wanna be me again..
I am happy living a hard life..
I’ve learnt a lot..
I’ve learnt the importance of giving instead of taking..
I’ve been taught to think abt otherz first instead of oneself..
I’ve been taught to stay strong despite how big the prob is..
N the list goes on..

Despite all the pains I go thru..
I will definately be strong.
Doesn’t matter how many time I fall..
I will still wake up n move on..!

:)

2009-04-10T02:32:00.003+08:00

itz GOOD FRIDAY!
Public holi for most.!
but im working!
no choice.gotto earn extra $$$$$!
got to pay my BILLS!

Just came home wile ago..!
Budd y y y y y y,
U should have jus stayed wid me.!
:(
But nvm..let my sick budz rest.!

Im just feeling happy!..
1 becoz my fren 4rm aus called me.!
Itz been so long since i toked to her man!.
i miss her so much..i miss the time we spent together!.
She scolded me for not informing her on my change of no..!
Oopz..My bad darlz!

2nd is becoz of my budz!
the only word is 'THANK YOU'!
for everything!
juz cnt spell things out!
u've done alot!
LuRvez OKay!
Will always tReasure u!
Ice cream soon okay??
:)

Still not slpy!
hm m m m m m m m mm !

cant wait to meet my mumbais at momo party!
itz been long!
lets have fun aitez!
:)

hm m m m m..

duno what to say anything!

BYE!

2009-04-06T21:29:00.003+08:00

Ahya!

I guez i was wrong when i said that!
I din think..i jus said what came to my mind!
Maybe i shouldnt have said it..

becoz..

HE TREATS ME THE BEST!

*says sorry to her 1st party*!

and thanks for all the advicez,encouragement ppl!

I am doing gd..!
No worriez!

BABA is very strong! :)

2009-04-04T22:53:00.005+08:00

Hi all!
woke up awile ago!
tired..
stress..
pissed..
fucked up..

Should be @ quack's party..!
but here i am at home..
having head pain!
haix!

Morning went to work!
SC & ME onli!
busy finishing our own works!!
Left ard 1 plus..rushed back home.!
Cuz planned to meet aunty ard 5 to go for party..!
came home..
n everything changed!
haiz!

I've juz got too much qnz on my mind!
How did 3 close sibz become 3 diff ppl? ? ? ? ?

Life has always been painful for us!
But we were close as a family.! were happy facing all the probz that came our way..!
but now..the same family seems so sour!
WHY?? ? ?

I noe i do have a very bad mouth!..
wen im angry,i say things w/o thinking..
im jus to direct..!
n im fucking sacarstic always!
nth new!
i noe my mistake n i admit it.!
But there's a reason why such harsh words come out!
Because I CARE!
thats is y i even bother to scream or shout..!
How can some1 who noes me for so long not noe me? ?? ?
At least i say off everything..nth is in my heart..!
but those who keep everything inside their heart..now those r the danger wanz!
Everyone is diff..! Agreed:)
But y is it u scream,shout n defend urself when the prob has become big??
y din u defend urself in the beginning??

Being the eldest in the family..n having a single parent..
ive gone thru so much of pain!
even now i am having so much pressure,burden,responsibilitez!..
No matter how much i hurt inside, im always smiling on the outside..!
So ppl ard me would be happy too..!
But hw long can i do that??
Even something strong does collaspe one day!

All our life..it has alwasy been prob..!
We have nvr gotten anything we want.!
Even if we see anything we love..we nvr get it!
Thats how my sibz & i have lived all our life!
n we have NVR expected anything from ppl..!
We have nvr been greedy.!
I had rather be poor n have a peaceful life!
All i ask for is HAPPINESS! ! !!
Is it something to big to ask??
i duno anymore..!

The brother whom i've supported always..
Whenever he ask something..if i got $ i get it for him..!
if he needed help..i helped!
i stood up for him..
when my mum layz hand on him..
i was there to defend him!
But 2day he looked at me and said 'whats ur prob..dun act fierce wid me'..
how better life can get rite??

fuck it man!
Feeling SUper tired..
I need to have peace..fun..happiness.!
I need to be wid ppl who loves me for who i am!

SANAH! I AM SO SORRY!

i din turn up last min..!

so so so sorry!

i feel dam bad! ahya!

hope u had fun!

see u soon ladee!

2009-04-04T04:18:00.005+08:00

SANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!! ! !!

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY!! !! !

WE EE E E E E E E E E E E E :)

u have joined me now!

See u ltr at nyte kiez??

ITZ UR DAY!

SO BE HAPPY QUACK!

2009-04-04T03:54:00.010+08:00

Good Morning World! :)

Itz like 4 in the morn!
i've work in the morn..
n i still fucking awake!

came home at 3!
if i were to slp nw,sure KO!
scared cant wake up or end up going work late..!
got unfinished work to complete!

Work was tiring 2day!
so many ppl take sudd leave!
so MUCH of orderz!
tiringggg!

Met Jasee Darlz @ JP aft work!
Jalan jalan awile..!

After that went to meet budz!
accompany him drop his fren @ bedok!
But ended up,all slacking & gambling at bukit batok!
His yung1 & gang came down!
I din drink or gamble!
i noe bit of the gamez..
but they seem like proz..!
so i backed out!
Jus slack down there..!

It was a TOTAL new group..
New people!
Everything was new.!
So 1st meetup..usually its abit different!
all quiet n all.!
but i did try to make things comfortable!..
Hope i wasnt being an Extra there!

Left BB at 1am!
Went drp cheez at bedok..
Slack there awile..!
n headed back to JURONG! :)
Home sweet Home!

Ride back home was quiet.!
was toking abit den started thinking..
so went to quiet mode..!
there was a part..
i turned over n just looked at my buddy..
he was like 'why da?'
haha!
It just feels gr8 to be wid ur close wan!
Jus love looking at my buddy!

Since yung,i've lost a dad'z love.!
there r timez i yearn for it..!
Maybe thats y wen im wid my close wans i am happy.!
I care too much cuz i dun want to lose them!
Thats y even a small harsh words, or they treat me different..
I get Hurt real bad!

Now!
Online,chatting wid budz..
His asking me to slp..so i wun be tired tmw..!
hmmmmm!
still wondering!

n lastly

I LOVE YOU BUDDY! HUGZ!

2009-03-30T00:18:00.002+08:00

30 MAR 09

HapPy 19th bIrthday Aahraf!

Lovez :)

2009-03-30T00:10:00.007+08:00

29 MAR 09

My bro has turned 15 yrz!

Things r SO diff now!

When ppl grow,things change!

esp,wen itz a guy!

he turns to become a stranger!

they turn to frenz when they r in need.!

family is no more their top priority!

No matter what it is,

i will be the sister who lovez him always!

HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY DEARESt!

2009-03-29T23:47:00.004+08:00

Hey all..!

weekendz over so fast again!

slpt like 5 plus on fri nyte..
ytd was a SUPER tiring day!
Wasnt in the right mood early morn.!
was very upset.!
haiz!
went to work!
end at 2..
met frenz at town!
When to buy thingsz..
i died walking ard man!
by the time we left town was like 8 plus??
wtf rite..!
i wanted to go home..
but frenz din let..!
wen over to jp..
to get some stuffz..!
n guez who i saw..

SHUAN CHEN . .. .. . . . . . . :)
wow! fucking gd looking..
i got toooo excited!
hahahahaha!

reached home ard 10 pluz..!
KO at ard 12pluz-1!
woke up at 1 pm!
haha!
dam dam dam TIred!

whole day rot at home!
watching dramaz!

sudd urge to go clubbing..
or maybe..
jus wanna go somewher to realli have lotz of FUN!
i realli need a break!

din really tok much wid my buddy!
hm m m m m!
sad!

i have managed to meet some of my frenz aft SO LONG!

met up quack to go bk home aft work!
itz feel so diff!
b4 we were studentz..!
nw we r both busy wid our own stuff!
meeting up..going bk home..catching up on stuffz!..
it felt GR8! :)

Another 2 pigs that i met aso!
i miss them so much!
the fun !

Oritez ppl!

GUD NYTEZ!

2009-03-26T22:39:00.006+08:00

boo :)

had no time to update!
been pretty busy wid work n stuff!

My previous blog skin screwed up.!
duno wat happen..!
so i juz changed into something i can!
haha!
no time to edit n all!

i gg off!
:)

will update properly real soon!

LOVE U ALL!

2009-03-17T22:16:00.003+08:00

One of my fren's fren's dad passed away!
2day was his funeral..
he met with an accident..!
When my fren told me that,although i dun noe the person,i felt very very sad..!
Because i noe the pain of losing a loved one.!
I noe how it feels when someone who has to be there for u is GONE!
Its a pain that can never be erased!

Alot of ppl take things for granted!
They dun realise what they have till it is gone.!
We should treasure everyone we have!
Forgive & forget..
create alot of memories..

Alot of ppl still have both ur parents ard..
treasure them,dun take them for granted.!
At least u have them as a support always!
i lost my dad when i was very young!
The pain is still wid me & will always be wid me till my death!

Stay happy all!

2009-03-17T22:10:00.003+08:00

Life is really getting fucked up nowadays!
itz always probz after probz!
im realli getting tired!

everyone say im a strong person..
i face everything that comes my way..
i agree..!
thru out all the probz,i have stayed strong..
But even a strong person does fall at a pt of time.!
Im really losing it..!
Mind doesnt seem to be in peace at all.!!
Everytime im stressed!

I jus fucking turing 22..
y the hell do i have SO MUCH of responsibility?
y is it always pain in life?
y doesnt any happiness last at all?

I WISH YOU WERE HERE..! I AM LOSING IT..! I REALLY CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!

2009-03-01T11:49:00.004+08:00

life's been really really tiring for me..!
probz probz & PROBZ!

Cant help but to ask..

WHY probz after probz??
WHY someppl only have happiness?
WHY someppl only go thru pain all their life?
WHY such unfair treatment???

Guess i gotto find my own answerz!

Sometimes i really envy all those who got everything..
whatever they want,they get it anything..
but still they want more! ! ! ! ! ! !
For all those ppl..,please treasure & be happy wid all you have..
Dun take things for granted..
N please dun be greedy..!
One day,if you lose everything, i swear you wun be able to survive..
You never noe the pain of going out with nothing..!
Just like a begger.!!!

Be happy that you are blessed wid a good life!

2009-03-01T11:44:00.003+08:00

Boo :)

weekends past by very fast..
the nxt thing i noe itz back to work!
sianx..!
work is good..
juz laziness!
haha!

as time passes by,
people change..
things change..

now everyone is so busy wid their own lives,that it is so diff juz to meet up!
now already like that.
5-10 yrz down the road? ? ? ?
we might be still frenz..
or we might become strangerz!

!!!!!!

2009-02-08T13:13:00.009+08:00

What is friendship?
Sometimes I wonder.. .

My definition of friendship..

-u have to be who u r..
-u dun have to change for another person.
-accept ur fren 4 what he/she is.
-if u r really in the wrong..u should say sorry.shldnt hold back..
-give in & take when it is needed.
-if the fren is really impt,never ever give up on them in any situation.
-argumentz, quarrelz,fightz,misunderstanding..all this makes up friendship..what is friendship w/o them??
-if the friendship cnt stand all the above..in the 1st place..why r u even frenz?

- -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

LOGA my buddy!

known him for 8 yrs nw.!
got lotz of funny memoriez..
how things all started.
a period wher we lost contact for yrz..
din noe y till nw.
but here we are..
still going on strong as best buddies.!
we quarrel SO MUCH!
even small issues ends up in a big prob!
no1 wants to give in..
coz both of us r stubborn individualz!
but despite all these,he is MY BEST!
n i will nvr give up on my friendship..
he is something best happened in my life..
dayz w/o him..hard to imagine..
he scolds me,shows attitude,gets angry at me..
but he still treats me the best!
coz he Lovez me :-p
at the end of the day,that is one only matterz..
He is MY BUDDY!

this is how important friends r!
people tend to take things for granted..
they find it so diff to say SOrry!
n end up losing a frenz!
try saying sorry..
it will change alot of thingz!
tok things out..
never keep things in ur heart..

So to all my frenz,who i have hurt them directly or indirectly..
I AM SORRY! :-)
friendship has to go on.. !

2009-02-08T12:51:00.004+08:00

:-)

Feeling dam tried..
weekends seemz to past by so fast..
no time to rest.!
was out the whole day yst..
Went shopping wid big sis..!
Bought a few stuff.!
Had lunch at lucky plaza..
i hate the feeling of gg to town on weekendz..
coz mon - fri, i gotto go there too.!
sianx!!!

life'z been pretty ok..
up & dwnz here & there..
but thingz r smooth now..
expect 1 thing. . . .
haix..!
hope what i wish for will happen..
thats the only thing i ask for!

Ciaoz!

2009-02-01T20:48:00.007+08:00

Boo!!!

yet another weekend has passed so fast.

back to work tmw!

time flies man..

itz already feb..

god.!

met my sistarz rasmi & huimin on fri..

it feels sooooo good seeing them after a long time..!

itz doesnt matter hw long we din meet or tok..

wen we meet,we jus go crazy n mad..

having dinner,slacking till late nite,sharing &toking..

more of it aitez!

Next is celebrating valentine day wid my mumbaiz..

wee e ee e e e e!

gotto start thinking what to make..!

Hmmmmmm m m m m ..

SeeUallSOOn!

Jasee darlz..

Meet Up soon..

i miss u Buddy! :-(

tataz!

2009-01-27T20:53:00.003+08:00

nowadays everythings seems to difficult..
economy is down..
prices going up & down..
so hard to get a permanent job.
everything under contract.

how long will such job last.?????
Or how much can such job pay??

Really have to upgrade myself & get a better & permanent job..
office job isnt going to work for me in a long run..

i really duno..
if i wanna take degree in pyscology or early childhood..????
hmmmmmmm m m m ..
really wanna do something that will give me a stable job in future..
everyone in my house is asking me to take up teaching..
it is really good pay..
stable job too..

..... . .

ConfusEd . . .. .!

2009-01-27T20:45:00.003+08:00

boo =)

4 days of holi,just flew by so fast..
Nw,its back to work tmw..
abit sianx!
but itz ok..
3 more days to the weekend.!

feeling so tired lately..!
tired of thinking..!
as time past by,everything seems to change.
Y is it so hard for ppl to be the same?
haix.!
b4 we used to argue & quarrel for everything.
but b4 the days end,everything would be cool.
But now,things r diff..
We argue & we stop toking..
Haix!
its not our fault..
sometimes being jus who we r aso creates prob..!
headache.!
i duno hw long this argumentz is going to be this time..!
Hope we'll give in like what we always do..!
coz u're important.!

2009-01-25T04:02:00.003+08:00

its you who din noe the most basic thing abt me..

n u get angry at me..

n u say i m someone special in ur life..

sometimez i realli wonder,is that even true. . .

ahyaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

2009-01-19T17:26:00.003+08:00

hi all!

finally got the time to update..
life has been busy..
work n all.. !
too much things to handle..
haix..!

i am on leave 2day..
have not been feeling well since fri..
sianx!
i hate being weak & having pains all ovr the body..
arghhh h h .

Sorry to my mumbais..
lunch was cancelled cuz of mi..
=((
sorry quack..
sorry momo..

have a safe n fun trip back to indo ok? =)

back to work tmw..
gonna be a busy work b4 the long weekend..
cant wait for it..

seeuguyzsoon..

seeyaALL!

2009-01-05T21:09:00.003+08:00

yes itz been long since i last updated..
been super lazy n tired haha..!

so fast new yr has passed..
chinese new yr is on the way..
time is flying..!

beginning of new yr was gr8!..
mumbaiz n frenz were having lots of fun @ momo place..
playing & doing retarded thing..
=)

work is good too..
my collegues n boss r gr8 ppl..
there r so funny,etc GILA!..hahaha!
work is nvr boring wid them ard..

nw life is busy wid work,home,frenz..!
always feel dam tired at the end of each day..!

i cant wait for upcoming meeting wid frenz..=)

lets go crazy ppl!

i miss u buddy.. =)

i got lots of picz to upload but i m dam lazy..keke..
someother time maybe..

tkcre all!

lovez!